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Separation Anxiety – Why It Happens and How to Help Your Dog

by shibashake 151 Comments

What is Dog Separation Anxiety?

In some ways, dogs are like humans.

Like us, dogs like routine and often get stressed over large changes in their schedule. This is especially true for negative changes that they do not expect, and do not understand.

Dog separation anxiety usually occurs when our own schedule shifts, thereby disrupting the amount of time we are able to spend with our dogs. When faced with such disruptions, dogs may get stressed and become destructive.

A dog with separation anxiety may chew up household items, and urinate or defecate in the house.

Note that these are displacement behaviors, that occur as a result of stress. They are NOT the result of dominance, vengeance, or maliciousness.

To fix separation anxiety issues, we want to target and reduce our dog’s stress, and not punish him with physical corrections. Pain or dominance based punishment, will often increase stress, and thereby worsen our dog’s anxiety problems.

What is Dog Separation Anxiety?

Dealing With Dog Separation Anxiety

Sadly, we will sometimes get busy, need to travel, or work long hours to meet a deadline. After all, we must go out in the wild world, so that we may put kibble on the table.

Therefore, how do we deal with separation anxiety, and make things better for our dogs?

Dogs may suffer from separation anxiety even in a multiple dog household.

Dog Separation Anxiety 1 – Daycare

Dealing With Dog Separation Anxiety.
Dog Separation Anxiety Option 1 - Daycare.

One of the best ways to deal with schedule changes, is to put our dog in daycare. In this way, he gets the company of humans and dogs, while we are away. He also gets to brush up on his dog-to-dog, and dog-to-human socialization skills.

Before committing to a daycare center, it is important to drop by for a tour of the facilities. Ensure that the place is clean, well supervised, and suited to our dog’s temperament. However, even a well-run daycare center may sometimes fail to detect dogs that carry common ailments, such as kennel cough, puppy warts, demodectic mange, and fleas.

Therefore, make sure that our dog is up to date on his vaccinations, before putting him in daycare or boarding.

A dog who is up to date on shots, may still catch something from playing all day long with so many different dogs. This is especially true for puppies and younger dogs, who still have developing immune systems. Unfortunately, this is a risk we must accept, if we decide to put our dog in daycare.

Make sure that our dog is up to date on his vaccinations before putting him in daycare or boarding.

Dog Separation Anxiety 2 – Pet sitter

Dog Separation Anxiety Option 2 - Pet sitter.

If we are uncomfortable with sending our dog to a public daycare, we can also hire a pet sitter to keep his separation anxiety issues at bay. The sitter can walk him, and keep him company at home.

Make sure our pet sitter is insured, qualified, has good references, and most importantly, gets along well with our dog.

Although they may be more expensive, I try to find sitters who are also dog trainers. This means they have more experience with dog behavioral issues, and can better deal with a misbehaving, stressed, or fearful canine.

Make sure to give the pet sitter our cellphone number, the location of our vet, as well as special instructions for our dog, including allergies and important house rules.

Make sure the pet sitter is insured, qualified, has good references, and most importantly, gets along well with our dog.

Dog Separation Anxiety 3 – Try to keep to a schedule

Dog Separation Anxiety Option 3 - Try to keep to a schedule

Another way to alleviate separation anxiety issues, is to try and keep to a fixed schedule.

During holidays, go out and visit some friends, so that our dog has his usual alone time. If we have to be away unexpectedly, have a familiar friend come over to fill in for us.

If the change in routine is temporary, we can also have our dog stay over at a friend’s house. First, try bringing our dog over for several short visits. In this way, we are around to make introductions, and help him with the transition to a new environment.

If all goes well, do short stay-overs, then slowly lengthen the time.

Dog Separation Anxiety 4 – Exercise our dog

I take my dog out for a long walk before leaving. This will give him an opportunity to fully relieve himself outside, and also put him in a more restful state of mind.

I take my dog out for another walk, after I get home. Exercise helps to relieve stress, and gives our dog important mental and physical stimulation. Neighborhood walks also help to socialize our dog to a variety of people, objects, other dogs, and other animals.

If we had to stay cooped up in the house all day, we would get cabin fever as well.

Exercise will help to relieve stress and gives our dog important mental and physical stimulation.

Dog Separation Anxiety 5 – Desensitize our dog

Dog Separation Anxiety Option 6 - Desensitize our dog.
I leave my dog many interactive, chew-safe food toys, while I am away.

Get our dog accustomed to us leaving the house.

First, I start with the ritual of getting my handbag and keys, as well as wearing my shoes. I walk to the door, then sit back down. I repeat this many times throughout the day, so that my dog gets comfortable with my “leaving the house” ritual.

Once this occurs, I walk to the door, leave, and come back to the room. I repeat this until he is relaxed again, then slowly lengthen the time that I am away.

When I achieve an away-time of about 15 minutes, I get in my car, circle the block, and come back.

Make leaving and coming home as low-key as possible.

When I return home, I ignore my dog until he is calm and resting. In this way, he does not spend all day anticipating my return. I also leave him with many interactive, chew-safe food toys, so that he has something interesting to do when home alone.

Make leaving, and coming home as low-key as possible.

Dog Separation Anxiety 6 – Dog Medication

There are a variety of medications available, to help treat dog separation anxiety symptoms. However, to be effective, these medications must be used together with a behavior modification program, which includes a rigorous exercise and desensitization routine.

The medication alone will not solve our dog’s anxiety issues. However, it can help mute the symptoms, so that our dog can benefit from the accompanying retraining process.

Dog medication should only be used under the direction of a vet, and only for the short-term.

Dog Separation Anxiety

Dealing with dog separation anxiety will take time, and a lot of patience.

In general, prevention is better than cure. Therefore, we want to start desensitization exercises as early as possible, before any anxiety problems develop.

If we have a very busy lifestyle, consider volunteering at our local shelter or SPCA instead of buying a puppy.

Only get a dog when our schedule becomes more regular, so that there is less danger of separation anxiety, and other behavioral issues.

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Comments

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  1. John merc says

    September 1, 2014 at 1:14 am

    My girlfriend and i recently adopted a dog. a year and a half year old siberian husky. and moved from sacramento to monterey bay ca (about 2 and a half hour drive). He is a wonderful sweet dog and is very good as long as either myself or girlfriend are around. however I work full time and she is a full time student. So he has to stay at home for long lengths of time by himself. He works himself into an anxiety attack where his breathing becomes heavy and fast. we cant seem to calm him.we take him for multiple walks everyday. we talk him to the beach and to a local dog park. The only thing that seems to give him relief is a small nerf foot ball with a squeak toy inside. but we cant always let him have it as we live in a college community where people need either sleep or quiet study time.
    A little more back ground on him, In his previous home,he had other dogs with him when his foster family left, he was never alone. however before this temperary home had him he was neglected and was found with severe mange and fleas (was probably abused before being found). He was taken to a shelter and we adopted him as soon as he was healthy enough to be adopted.
    He is also for the most part untrained ( we have only had him about 2 weeks total) but we have successfully gotten sit and come down especially in calm environments.
    what can we do to help his anxiety (as i am writing this he is anxitious and starting to dig into furniture)?

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      September 4, 2014 at 2:10 pm

      My Shiba Inu, Sephy, had some separation anxiety when he was young. What helped with him was to slowly desensitize him to alone time. I first start with very short amounts of alone time (seconds) and very slowly build-up from there. Desensitization helped Sephy to build confidence and to become more relaxed in his own company. I talk more about what I did with Sephy in the article above.

      This article from the ASPCA has more information on separation anxiety, including desensitization training.
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/dog-behavior/separation-anxiety

      However, for desensitization to work, it was necessary to ensure that Sephy does not suffer from more anxiety attacks. Success helps to build Sephy’s confidence. Similarly, the more anxiety attacks he has, the more fearful he becomes, and his behavior will worsen. Therefore, I made sure there was a trusted caretaker with Sephy at all times, until he became confident enough to handle time on his own.

  2. Maggie says

    August 29, 2014 at 9:56 am

    Hi,

    I really need some help here. We recently relocated and it was a tedious task to move my dog out of the house. It’s a pug and it remained mostly indoors and she was unwilling to cooperate. We somehow carried her and drove her to the new place. Now ever since we moved to the new place (it’s been 3 days) she has not come out of the bedroom and hides herself under the cot. She eats but however has not been urinating or pooping. She is in shock and has detached herself from us. What can i do to make her normal? I’m concerned about her health as it’s important to excrete the pee and the poop out of her system. We are puzzled as we cannot get her out of the house to take her to the vet! Please help me with some suggestions.

    Worried dog lover šŸ™

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      August 30, 2014 at 3:33 pm

      What was her behavior like before the move? How old is she? What was her routine like before the move? What type of training is she used to? How many years have you had her?

      We are puzzled as we cannot get her out of the house to take her to the vet

      Why can’t you get her out of the house? Does she get aggressive when you try to carry her? Will she go into her crate? Is she crate trained? Was she comfortable travelling by car before the move?

      I would take her to the vet and also get help from a good professional trainer/behaviorist ASAP.
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/finding-professional-help
      https://apdt.com/pet-owners/choosing-a-trainer/

  3. Sharlene says

    June 30, 2014 at 5:09 pm

    I have a 14 year old Rat Terrier (he is a rescue that we have had for almost 5 years) that has what I think is bad separation anxiety. My family had to go out of town for 4 days and we brought him to a sitter’s. When he got home after about 2 hours he pee’d on my bed. He does this every time we go away. When I go to work or take my kids out to ride bikes he will sit in front of the door and wait for me to return. Is there any way of breaking this habit ? Should I find an in home sitter instead ?

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      July 2, 2014 at 9:42 pm

      Changing environments can certainly be another source of stress, so with my dogs I try to keep things as stable as possible. In addition, I slowly get them used to alone time through desensitization, and I slowly get them used to each of their caretakers/sitters so that they are comfortable when I am not around.

      This article from the ASPCA has more on separation anxiety-
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/dog-behavior/separation-anxiety

  4. james says

    June 11, 2014 at 3:50 pm

    I have a shiba mix. And we had a sitter that we trust watch hin for three days as we went out of town. Now he will not eat but plays and loves on us still.

    Reply
  5. Kayleigh says

    June 10, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    Sorry just an add on to my comment , when we was at my mums if we needed to go out she would go in the cage and there would be no problem but we thought she was getting too old for the cage so haven’t brought it with us but I can’t use that as I would be gone too long for her to be in the cage , thankyou

    Reply
  6. Kayleigh says

    June 10, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    Hi I have a ten month old lab, and have recently moved out in a flat my dog was use to being around my mums dog and my mum and her partner every day I wasn’t there so she’s never really been left alone, her separation issues have got worse I shut the front door for one minute and she was howling and barking the place down, even if I get in the bath and shut the door she’s scratching and crying even though my boyfriend is there, she’s also recently came on her first period so she has got very clingy just don’t know what to do as there will be days where no one can hae her while I’m at work, please help

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      June 12, 2014 at 10:20 pm

      Moving to a new place can be very stressful for a dog. When we moved houses, I quickly set up a fixed schedule and routine for my dog, a consistent set of rules, supervised him more, and took him on longer walks in quiet hiking trails (something which he enjoys) so he can exercise and relax. In general, I want to create as much certainty as possible, make my dog feel safe, and give him positive outlets for his energy.

      As for separation anxiety, I start with very short periods of alone time and very slowly build up my dog’s tolerance. The more successful sessions my dog has, the more confidence he builds. Similarly, panic attacks and negative experiences will undermine that confidence and significantly set back training.

      Therefore, it is very important to keep things positive, especially during the rehabilitation period. If I cannot be home, then I get somebody that my dog trusts to be with him. To earn my dog’s trust, I feed him, play with him, walk him, and interact with him in other positive ways. I get others in the family to participate in these things as well, so that they can care for him when I am not around. Alternatively, I may drop him off at a place that he enjoys and is comfortable in (daycare, relatives, good friend).

      I talk more about what I do in the desensitization section of the article above. All of my dogs are spayed or neutered.

      there will be days where no one can hae her while I’m at work

      What about your mom? If things are currently too hectic, perhaps puppy can stay with your mom for a bit longer?

  7. Julia B says

    May 23, 2014 at 8:39 pm

    Hello,
    I have a dog that has serious anxiety and has a tendency to attack other dogs. He is on medication but due to this we keep him away from other dogs as much as possible. However we have a second dog (who he gets along with wonderfully) and we sometimes take her down to out local dog friendly beach. This means we have to leave our anxious dog at home and he freaks out whenever he is separated form her. Do you have any tips on how to calm him down for short periods of time?

    Cheers,
    Julia

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      May 25, 2014 at 9:53 pm

      With my dog, I slowly get him used to alone time by starting small and going in very small steps. For example, I may start by just leaving the room, and then coming right back in. I keep repeating, until my dog is totally relaxed and comfortable with this. Then I *very slowly* increase the length of alone time.

      During the retraining process, I make sure never to expose my dog to more than he can handle. Having a panic attack would undermine his confidence and set back our training. I talk more about what I do in the desensitization section of the article above. Exercise, consistency, and a fixed routine also help to create more certainty and helps to reduce stress.

      These ASPCA articles have more information on separation anxiety-
      http://www.aspca.org/blog/how-ease-your-dogs-separation-anxiety
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/dog-behavior/separation-anxiety

  8. Maryam says

    May 9, 2014 at 2:08 am

    Hi Shibashake,
    I recently went on a family holiday and left my gsd in a kennels…she enjoyed it very much and has shown no signs of distress. However, my aunt also boarded her 1 1/2 year old yorkie.
    Since she’s been home, shes been yelping, barking and howling most of the night. She has now also started doing her ‘ business ‘ everywhere inside the house (including the sofe ¬.¬ ).
    Please could you advise me on what is wrong with her and how to fix it.
    Thanks a lot.

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      May 12, 2014 at 4:18 pm

      Based on what you describe it does sound like stress, but it is not possible to say for sure without looking at the dog, her environment, the kennel environment, routine, etc.

      How old is your GSD? What type of kennel was she at? Has she been to the same kennel before? Has she stayed in a kennel before? How long was she at the kennel? What is the routine like for the dogs at the kennel? Do the dogs each have their own area or do they have to share? What was she like when you picked her up? How is she with other dogs at regular times? How is she with other dogs now? Has anything else changed in her routine? Is she eating and drinking normally? Is she usually by herself at night? Does she only do her business in the house when she is alone? Does she only vocalize when she is alone? Does she do this during the day when she is alone? What is her regular routine like?

      Dog behavior is very context dependent. When my dog’s behavior changes, I first rule out physical issues. Then I try to identify where the behavior is coming from and what exactly triggers the behavior, e.g. time of day? being alone? being in a particular location?, etc. I do this by asking detailed questions of myself, similar to the ones I listed above.

      More on how I trouble-shoot undesirable behavior changes in my dog.

  9. Naomi says

    April 25, 2014 at 12:14 pm

    I have a siberian husky that is going nuts when I leave the house. I don’t leave very often as I don’t drive and I work at home. But I do work long hours so I can’t just do the do the desensitizing all the time. Maybe 2 days out of the week. Is there anything else I could do? Daycare and a sitter seems a little silly since I’m rarely out of the house. If I’m going to be gone for long, I get a friend to watch them or take them to the park. But 5 minutes out of the house, she goes nuts destroying everything.

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      April 29, 2014 at 4:18 pm

      Here are a few more articles on separation anxiety-
      http://www.vetmed.ucdavis.edu/vmth/small_animal/behavior/local-assets/pdfs/Separation_Anxiety_in_Dogs.pdf
      http://www.humanesociety.org/animals/dogs/tips/separation_anxiety.html
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/dog-behavior/separation-anxiety

  10. Aimee says

    April 19, 2014 at 5:34 am

    My husband and I got this little terrier poodle mix on the first day she was ok nothing wrong but ever since then shes become a total nightmare!! We are a military family so we are stationary for a few years so moving Kant the issue we walk her first thingin the morning curbing tjr weekdays and at seven on the weekends. As of recent shes gotten worse with peeing in the house most times when we are there!!! I don’t work as I’m pregnant. And my husband doesn’t want me to but the stress of our dog is driving me nuts! I can go to check the mail and she will do batnut crazy barking crying and acting out. I left to go food shopping I was gone three hours at the Max I had taken her put shed done her duties and brought her back…. when I came home… omg I didn’t know what to do!!! Shes ripped apart my accepts letter into college tore up my husbands acus for work gone to the bathroom in her cage tore up her bedding. I let her out so I could clean the mess took her put before I started she went came inside and peed all over by shoes couch and bed!!!! She has only gotten worse in the two months of owning her we’ve tried leaving her with people but shes so hyper she hurts the kids and I’m scared when my baby is born she will be to rough with her or him :'( I love My dog shes a good girl but awedil potty habbits!!!!!!!

    Reply
    • shibashake says

      April 22, 2014 at 2:42 pm

      How old is she? Has she been potty trained?

      The key thing with potty training my puppy is supervision. In the beginning, I had to supervise her all the time and I do not allow her to freely roam without close supervision. If I am unable to supervise, even for just one minute, I put her in a safe enclosure with potty pads.

      Here is an account of my first 10 days with a new puppy. It was not pretty. šŸ™‚
      More on how I potty train my puppy.

      As for alone time, what has worked well for my puppy is to start small and very slowly build up her tolerance for alone time. I want to maximize successes, so that she builds confidence. At the same time I want to minimize bad events or stress attacks which will undermine her confidence and significantly set back training. I talk more about the desensitization exercises that I do with my dog in the article above.

      This separation anxiety article from the ASPCA also has a lot of information-
      http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/dog-behavior/separation-anxiety

      More on how I train my puppy.
      More on how dogs learn.

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